Die Young & Save Yourself

Tue, 03 Jun 2008 22:31:55 GMT

DETRIOT ELECTRONIC MUSIC FESTIVAL last weekend was the coolest thing Ive ever done in my entire life
I danced non stop for like 5 hours
and did my best moves;)
me and DJ were in dance offs and rocked it
I think thats where I belong forever
I should live at demf.

I am finally out of school
after this weekend when I walk and the rehearsal
I will be done with school forever
well until october really
but I get a bigass break and Im excited about it
I fucking hate school and all the lame ass niggers that go there.

This weekend was a chill weekend
DJ spent the weekend with me pretty much
He came over friday and we just watched movies
until my power went out then we died of heat stroke
I had my last saturday schoool EVER
then came home and had my yard sale
I made fuckin 35 bucks hells shitty ass yeah.
Then Kadee came over and hungout with us and we went on adventures
and shit outside. we passed the biggest conquests.
then we went to the movies and seen "The strangers"
fuck that movie right in the asshole man.
I screamed my head off in the theaters and now I dont want to be alone for the rest of my damn life.
scary shit.
I ended up dropping DJ off and going to spend the night with nana and her lonesome self.
Papa is in missouri for a couple days
so Im staying with her to keep her company til he gets back
I know im cute as hell.

Sunday I went to my little cousins birthday party and then hung out with aaron:)
he took me to the movies and we seen "What happens in vegas"
it was cute and really funny.
then I stayed the night and we stayed up and watched movies all night long
oh and we got t bell:) mmmm hmmmm
Now Ive been working everyday still
my open house is coming up
everybody better come or people will die.
Last night brittany came over and hungout with me and DJ at nanas
Im bored.
kinda upset about what I lost the other day
but its a good thing I guess
I miss you too.

ERIKAS COMING HOME TOMORROW
SOMEBODY SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD
Im soo excited
for 2 fuckin weeks
yesssss

alright well ima have a movie night with nana:)

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 06:45:27 GMT

Im feeling really good right now
no boyfriend
no school
no work
and DJ for straight 7 days
days of getting drunk and dying.
not thinking about anything but having fun

hell yeah eat my shit.

Last night was fun
met a few new people:)
Brittany did my hair
lotso f blonde
I look fine as fuck
eat me out

Tonight was interesting:)
Last day in the big ass house..:(
Im really gonna miss it
I have 800 bucks to bring to Chicago with me
pretty much spending that all on myself
I deserve it man.
ummm?
I hung out with Aaron for a couple hours tonight
we always have so much fun together
even if its sitting there watching americas best dance crew
haha..
poop

hope you guys miss the shit out of me
cause im considering shutting off my phone
and only turning it on for family and brittany
everyone else can get fucked

These dreams go on when I close my eyes...

Wed, 26 Mar 2008 01:58:05 GMT

I thought that you were the last person to ever hurt me
and you did.
I put my faith in you
you were my last chance.
I was wrong about you..

House sitting is great
now im just really lonely when brittany isnt here.
the only person who comes to visit.
Aaron came to hangout the other day
he was there for me when nobody else was.
Even tho he hurt me badd before
its nice for him to be a good friend to me now
when somebody else does.

I get to go to chicago for a week in like 6 days
I leave this Sunday..
alls I know is theres gonna be a lot of shopping, boobies, boose, and good stufff:)
I hope the next couple weeks will cure my mind of other things

oh and when I get back I might be going to see an old friend at Grand Valley for a weekend
but thats a maybe.

A Clean slate sucks, third strike Im out.

well i still have this emptybig ass house til saturday
so if anybody wants to come hangout
some company would be really niccee

later cockhole.

shes everything I said and a whole lot more....

Tue, 11 Mar 2008 04:45:20 GMT

uuugggghhhhhhhh
I've had to go to the doctors the last couple days
They say I show all the signs of endometriosis
which makes my periods kill me and creates a bigger chance of me not being able
to have any kids.
They took my blood and I almost passed out
cause I hate needles..
Im going in for an ultrasound to check other things
to see whats wrong.

Stomach problems and Period problems
mmm hmm awesome

On a good note
I think I got into The Art Institute of Michigan
which is in Novi
that means I could still keep my job at the daycare and even stay at home if I wanted..
But I think me and Brittany might get a place
or Nick if hes not leaving me..

Im starting to get sick
I have this cough thats taking my voice and throat and ripping it in two.
I can not wait to house sit for these people I babysit for
I get there huge house to myself for 10 full days starting the 19th-29th!!!
they buy me food and give me 150 bucks and alls I have to do is feed there dog and shit.
fuck me right?
Then somewhere around the 20th DJ is gonna be home:)
gawwwd Im so excited
I really do miss him
hes my other half
then the 30th I have a bus ticket down to CHICAGO!!
to stay with DJ in his dorm
Ive been saving up lots of money so I can go city shopping
and me and DJ can just be wasted and dead for a week straight

BRITTANY IS BACK!! and I love it.
Her Birthday is this coming up weekend and were having a girls night at Fairfaxs
mm hmm you know what that means
tits and more tits
my kind of a good time..

Erika and David came to visit a couple weekends ago
Ive missed that whore
it was a lot of fun hanging out with her and stuff
she came to Fairfax one night
and I got completely trashed and naked for her
I love my life when DJ and Erika are home.
Everything feels like its in place
I have all the people I truely need in my life at once
DJ Erika Brittany and Nick
what more could a girl ask for??

oh 15 lbs less thats all
and I'm working on it;)
eat shit adriana lima we will be twins soon:)

I Love Nick Freeman
He makese me so happy
sometimes I just want to kick him in the face
he makes me too happy haha

ahhh poop.

get over yourself

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 04:49:25 GMT

your a bitch
mess with your own love life
your selfish and cruel
stay out of my business
i stay out of yours.
I tried to be your friend even before
and you let me down
what makes you think I wouldnt do such a thing to you?
i couldnt count on you
just as much as you could have counted on me before

have a nice life
please just stay out of mine.

Wed, 20 Feb 2008 23:33:09 GMT

honestly i need to start updating this thing ritually because lately its been
if I havent in a really long time
or if Im frusterated and in need of some venting ahha

so I have almost 600 bucks saved up already
its crazy I never knew I made that much until I stopped blowing my money
on stupid shit and actually started saving for something
I really want to go see Dj over Spring Break
hes my savour. I love and miss him to death
Erika is coming home on the 27th to visit for a while!
Im really excited
I need some people to hangout with that actually give a fuck about me.
that would be nice

Im sick and tired of everyones shit
everybody I tried to give a damn about has given up on me
I try to be a good friend and I just get shit on
well go fuck yourself Im done trying
I shouldnt fucking have to anyways.

someone special has been pissing me off lately
with your smartass comments
that dont know when to stop
your an asshole.
get over yourself
I try to be soo good to you
I dont deserve some of the things you say
YOUR PUSHING ME AWAY

I didnt get into gv
so now I dont know what im going to do
I suck at life
i hate you all
go die.

Sat, 16 Feb 2008 20:03:46 GMT

fuck you
you stupid fucking cunt bitch
I did eat some of your chocolates and I shit on the rest of them
I have my own labtop now so you cant bitch at me about
something that I DIDNT do to the computer
get fucked Im better than you and your a slutty ugly bitch.
ALSO its my room if I like it dirty and no floor room
thats how it will stay or you can clean it

Im gonna kill someone
I need to get out of this house
If I hear my stepmom bitch about anything else
Im gonna shave my head
hopefully Im gonna go see Carrie2 today and booger:)
then maybe later I'll end up going to Brittanys with that whore Sagen
haha

Valentines Day I went and seen Step up2
Corny and The dancing was awesome
I loved it.

Mah bought me a new hp labtop
her name is Camille
I love her.

I have a 4 day weekend so lets fuck

I wonder if you'll miss me when Im gone

Sun, 25 Nov 2007 23:50:22 GMT

"What if you
Could wish me away
What if you
Spoke those words today

I wonder if you'd miss me
When I'm gone
It's come to this, release me
I'll leave before the dawn

But for tonight
I'll stay here with you
Yes, for tonight
I'll lay here with you

But when the sun
Hits your eyes
Through your window
There'll be nothing you can do

What if you
Could hear this song
What if I
Felt like I belong

I might not be leaving
Oh so soon
Began the night believing
I loved you in the moonlight

So, for tonight
I'll stay here with you
Yes, for tonight
I'll lay here with you

But when the sun
Hits your eyes
Through your window
There'll be nothing you can do

I could've treated you better
Better than this
Well, I'm gone, this song's your letter
Can't stay in one place

So, for tonight
I'll stay here with you
Yes, for tonight
I'll lay here with you

But when the sun
Hits your eyes
Through your window
There'll be nothing you can do..."

Im been reborn.
I can start over
without you and be happier than ever.

I have everyone I need in my life already in it already.
This weekend DJ was home
It made me soo happy
Ive needed him to be with me for the past month
this weekend I didnt think of anything bad
It was perfect.
Me DJ Brittany and Nick went to brittanys:)
we rolled up into katamari balls and were one haha
then in the morning I woke up next to you
happy.

I hope this week will be the same

Sun, 21 Oct 2007 19:58:06 GMT

I havent updated in a really long time.
I miss all my old friends
people suck now a days.

Still trying to work things out with aaron I guess
hes always working
I know Im setting myself up for another heartache
but theres nothing else I really can do
either way im upset sooo

I had another one of my stomach fits
It started sunday night and got worst when I got out of school
it felt like I had been raped in the ribs by a huge black man
I couldnt even move and I had a 102 fever and felt like i was going to puke everywhere
Teresa took me to urgent care and they pushed on my stomach and said it was my gul bladder but I was too young for it and gave me some vics and some nausea pills and sent me home
but then it didnt go away so
I went to my doctor and he said it was
some crazy long name and gave me some pills to take everyday for ten days
and that I shouldnt go to work or school for the rest of the week not even go anywhere the weekend.
it was only tuesday by this time.
Ive been at home watching movies and being on a blan diet
it suckss
you really realize your true friends when things like this happen
oh well right?
friends will one day be as useless

My dad had these kinds of fits when his stomach problems started
he had to get his gul bladder removed and everything
my grandma and grandpa have it
and the doctors dont really know what it is
just that it really does suck.

Im going back to school tomorrow and its going to suck cuz i missed so much
sabrina is leaving today and I didnt even get to see her before she
left because I cant go anywhere.

Today Im suppose to hangout with aaron when he gets out of work
but I wonder if that will actually happen
it usually doesnt.
and it doesnt surprise me either
I miss him
but its like its not even him anymore
its getting easier for me to let go completely
and if thats not what he wants then he should get his shit together
because im getting sick of being treated like an option
not just by him by everyone.
I use to make people my priority

I'll just concentrate on school and work
all my clothes dont fit. too big.
its good but it sucks.

Homecoming last weekend was pretty fun
I didnt get drunk or anything
I think I deserve a good drinking night
I really miss DJ and Erika
I can count on them for anything
especially a good drinking night...

Writer's Block: Time Travel

Sun, 26 Aug 2007 20:02:38 GMT

If you could travel back in time to spend a day with someone, who would it be and why?

sabrina and the boy group we used to hangout with everyday
andy, jack, blake, angela, and whoever

I miss those days
and I cant ever have another one

cause jack went to boot camp
blake andy and angela moved to florida.
and sabrina has her own different life now in flint town
we dont talk that much
but I miss it.

Mon, 13 Aug 2007 22:33:29 GMT

Just got done peeling potatoes for my nana
I suck at it.

The wedding finally happened
it feels like a load has been lifted off my shoulders
I dont have to worry about fitting into anything really anymore
Im still on my crashfagg diet.
still losing
The wedding was awesome tho
I luhhed it.
there wasnt as much dancing as I thought there would be
but me and DJ did perform our krumpage
and everybody loved it.:)

I started my new job today
I get to stand around and watch little kids
at a daycare everyday
I get payed every 2 1/2 weeks
so ill be bawlin hopefully.

Aarons birthday is coming up
and Ill be able to get him something great
probably a little late but I got us the spill canvas
tickets for grand rapids.
I am so excited to see the look on his face when i tell him:):):)
kadees coming with us

Ima try and take my drivers test again
since I failed it
cuz I suck at life

but ima go eat and stuff
laterr

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 19:30:01 GMT

I hate life

suck a big fat one.

She talks over the sound, of the cars passing us by..

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 23:10:21 GMT

Wow. A lot has been happening lately.
and a lot of things are going to be happening
before I was having a little bit of depressing week
but this past week has done a full 360
Ive come to find that I am sublimely happy.
My mood ring has been dark blue and purple everyday:)
which means I am very happy,in love, passionate, sensual, clarity, and my purpose is known.
blah blahhhh

My car is getting fixed in the next couple days
its rumbling just like a vibrator.
Im suppose to be taking my driving test this Tuesday
Im pretty excited/nervous
I dont think I wont pass
someone I used to be good friends with
had to take it like 3 times
but she was a fucking retard so im not worried about it.

My job has been giving me the run around
I went up there for the job fair and they rescheduled it for the
day after
so then I woke up early AGAIN
and come to find out they were only talking to the
people with experience and they would call me to schedule an appointment.
gay.
Im going to go this week to put more applications out though just in case.

Brittany finally got a car
so I get to see her more often
Erika finally got her car
so I get to see her and DJ more often
So Im busy when Aarons not working
I really miss him
but you know whats sweet as fuck
Hes putting his tips all together
so me and him can take a trip to ann arbor
as soon as I get a job Im going to do that too
I love him
were perfect for eachother pretty much haha

I get to see carrie2 this week tooo
Im so happy she doesnt have to work finally so that means
we can stay up and sleep in
and the bitch wont fall asleep on me:)
Ive missed her and her belly

Also Ive been on this strict diet from hell
Im not aloud to weigh myself or fucking eat anything pretty much
I eat what my nana tells me to
and Im starving all the time haha
but Im going to look fucking fine as hell
hopefully I can look fine as hell in erikas wedding

I got a tanning membership too this week
so Im going to be tan as fuck

tan skinny happy = bawlin.

I wish I could have gone camping with kadee nick and joe tho
kinda bummed about that but there will be other times
I hope I can hang with you guys when you get back

I miss you kadeee bitch
me and you when you get back!

I love my friends, boyfriend, and life.

call me lets hangout soon niggers.

Wed, 20 Jun 2007 20:47:31 GMT

sooo today pretty much sucks a fat cock

all alone at my moms house
bored out of my mind
aarons truck just broke down again
on one of his days off.
im pretty pissed off about that
I have no ride anywhere

but this weekend is going to be pretty goood
friday kadeees:)
Its going to be good to see everybody

everybodys been busy or just too busy for me.

you know Im actually pretty fun to hangout with
one on one
if any of my friends would of noticed

carrie2, my own cousin, and aaron it seems like
everybody else only wants to hangout with everyone at once
which is cool at times but to build a good friendship
there has to be serious one on one time too
but maybe thats just me

I also dont like to be lied to
it seems like a friend of mine has been lying
just so i dont judge or whatever
which is stupid as fuck
cause if your one of my friends
I dont do that
and I wont mess up your "plans"
whateverrr.

this summer sucks
im suppose to be setting up an appointment for
my driving tests this week or next.
but I still wont have a job
I filled out more apps
but people dont want to hire anybody with no
job experience i guess
stupid.

Ive been having weird fucked up dreams about killing people
or people trying to kill me
what do you think? haha cause i have no idea

my nose itches everytime i go outside
I think im allergic
I need a tan
I miss my friends
pooop.
I have a cell phone callit.

the world dont spin without you..

Tue, 05 Jun 2007 21:15:55 GMT

I am starting to get sick
I have 2 days of school left
and the 2 days im taking exams
my throat is swollen and my head and nose feel
like there going to explode
Im waiting on my lovely boyfriend to get done
shopping with his mom.
then I get to go over there and he can baby me
while Im sick
yay!
Im looking forward not having school friday though:)
which means Im having my favorite people over at nanas
Erika and DJ, like old times
maybe even brittany.
Then saturday Brittanys open house
which Im really excited about.
thats going to be a lot of fun!
then Sunday is fuckign rediscover in ann arbor!
I am going to shit myself.
me carrie DJ , maybe kadee or erika
are suppose to be going to spend the day in ann arbor
then go to one of their shows later that night!
Im probably going to shit myself with joy.
I hope I get to go though
cause carrie2 was suppose to drive and
she might not be home in time from up north or something
I will kill myself.
what else is new?
lost weight
stop biting 7 of my nails
me and aaron are doing great
oh my mom doesnt know how to keep her business her own and other peoples
business not hers
immature I know.
she needs to stop interfering with other peoples lives
and start dealing with her own problems
shede probably feel better that way.
so Im pretty mad at her
my computer is lame
life could be better
but is going to get there
minues being sick
I love you
Im out of school as in next week
call me I got all the time in the world to make
plans with you:)

Sun, 27 May 2007 17:48:58 GMT

Depressed is a good word to describe me in the last few days
Ive depended on you when I guess I shouldnt
Ive let go of all my insecurities and the letdowns you have gave me
but only to recieve nothing in return
I have a feeling in my stomach that makes me want to throw up
and a migrane that makes me want to rip my head off.
I try so hard to make you feel like your above everything else
weve made mistakes
youve made more
but in the end it always comes down to you
and I dont feel appreciated anymore or wanted
I want that feeling back
your family and friends may hate me
but I havent gave up
and wont
unless you want me to.
then the word of the day will be the same but times that by 5 million

Im going to my moms today
therapy session with mah haha
She always understands no matter how much
of a bitch she can be at times
so movies and food
If I'll be at all hungry

also I was thinking about friends earlier among all this
and I dont feel like I have that many "true" friends like Ive said in my last entry.
I consider a true friend someone I can call when
Im knee deep in kleenex and my face looks like a punching bag and just
bitch or cry about anythign in the world and they know
exactly what to say or be there.
Im not one to open up but when I do
youll be surprised to know whats going on inside my head
I have like 2 of those I wish I had more

Well Ill be at my moms tonight since that special someone once again
decided to do something different with his time especially when were going through too much to even handle at the moment
what I want is to fall asleep for two days
but I think I'll just go to mahs instead
it would be nice to have some company..

sorry so emo.
if you dont like it
dont read it
I needed to vent.

I can't help but think about what might have been...

Wed, 23 May 2007 03:03:58 GMT

Karma.
"What goes around comes back around"
thats all I have to say about that.

Well Everythings been going really good
I feel very fulfilled:)
I went to prom with carrie2
that was awesome because we both looked fine as fuckk
then we picked up joe(brother bitch)
and went to andys with everyone
Old friends+ New friends= Best time in a while
I am madly in love and things with that have been absolutely amazing
weve both been pretty shady to eachother in the past but
I cant picture me with really anybody else.
I could shit in front of that boy
that means a lot :)

I have true friends that I can tell anything to
not in order Aaron, Joe, Carrie2, Kadee, DJ, Erika, Brittany, & Matt

Brittany says I got a job!
at gadzooks
Im part of the design team in designing the new store
yeah.. bawlin, I know.
well this weekend is memorial weekend and Im ready to get fucked
I miss some old friends.
give me a call well do something this weekend k?
18108200683
<33

Spring Break beginning:)

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 17:50:07 GMT

My spring break so far is pretty fun
I got almost a full week left and Im excited for whats next:)
this weekend was soo much fun
Aaron was up north so that was a downer but
I got to see most of everybody
Thursday I hungout with Aaron all day
layed around and watched movies and being silly:)
Friday was bingo night with Gma!!
me DJ and Erika got sooo many sweet prizes
I pretty much shit myself with joy.
bad part of that day was when we were goodwilling it up
a mannequinn fell on DJs toe and busted the skin and it was bleeding everywhere
seriously, only the weirdest shit would happen to people I know or me haha.
DJ went to the Christina Aguilera concert last night and Im jealous.
SAturday me carrie2 kadee and laura went to some invasion fest...
fuck that, that shit was 15 dollars.
I would have rather sat in the car and played with myself
It was good to see everybody tho
Brittany, Fairfax, and sagen bitch was there
soo good times
we were going to all go home because of easter the next morning
but me and carrie2 ended up going to matts
by the time I got there joe was already wasted and saying i love yous
I love that nigger more than words can describe lol
there was a bit of drama for everyone
but all in all it was agood night:):) :) :) :)

Easter was pretty much the best
My nana had an easter egg hunt in the house
and I found like 50 eggs and got 30 bucks out of it
bawlin. yess.

Monday hung out with aaron
we ended up going to jellybeans and got us some old movies:)
I love that store more than life,
and we went to salvation army too but we were unsuccessful
we got into an argument that made me want to rip his head off
but were okay now
Carrie2 ended up coming over to my moms last night and me aaron
her and my mom, my moms friend jay(whos doing my tattoo soon:))
were all drinking and .. havin fun haha
we played mario kart and 007
I definetly beat their ass
even drunk:)
me and carrie2 ended up watching hostel
eating pringles then falling asleep
the bitch is going to vegas and Ima miss her soo much:(

and today Im going to brittanys!!
I miss that whore
I hope all my favorite people are there
I always have fun there
and hopefully im seeing aaron before i leave
but you never know witht that lol

I want to hangout with everybody before spring break ends
and a lot
cause i miss everybody
ahhh niggerrs.
life is good
guilty? maybe.
Missing someone? yesss of course

cells always on me usually unless im drunk and i lose it haha
18108200683
<33

We both know this is make believe..

Fri, 16 Feb 2007 20:08:14 GMT

Yeah so yesterday I had no plans
which sucked because My dad was letting me stay home from school friday so I could do something last night. But I just stayed home, then I was waiting on Aaron and we got into this big fight and now things are weird. Im sitting around waiting for everyone else to not be busy and its pissing me off cause I dont want to sit at my fucking house and worry about my relationship. ITs fucking stupid I want to get out so I dotn worry about it. jesus. This weeekend is suppose to be sweet but its starting out really shitty. Im suppose to hangout with CArrie2 and Laura tonight but carrie doesnt get out of work until like 9:30. Then David, Erika, and DJ want to hangout but DJ is being slow...
Oh and I have no money to do anything this weekend..
But my nana is dropping off pop cans soon so that will be good:)
Now alls I need is someone to drive me to go cash them..
I need my damn License, this is getting rediculious.

LAter on this weeeknd Kadee said she might have people over and I was going to hangout with them and Brittany but Brittany said KAdee might not now or soemthing. gayyy.
Aaron is suppose to be hanging with me and my friends all weeekend but I dont knwo how that will go..
Call me or something maybe we can make plans too
love you
<33

Well you'll never find it, if you're looking for it, Won't come your way.

Mon, 05 Feb 2007 02:13:27 GMT

So its been forever since Ive updated this thing
wow
a lot has happened..
I fell in love a couple times I think.
not as strong as the first
but it never will be.

Ive realised who I can rely on for my bestfriends
people that actually want to hangout with me
and dont screw me over for their girlfriends or boyfriends
I consider myself a very good and trustworthy friend
if somebody doesnt treat me the same
then they can get out of my life :)

Im back with Aaron now and were doing better than ever
after I found out about him being a whore pretty much.
If he doesnt stay in line Ill fucking rip his balls off and feed them to him, then Ill be free.

Also Im not some backup
dont tell me one minute I mean everything to you
then dont talk me the next
Its a waste of both of our time.
I pretty much hate you now..
it takes a lot to hurt me and you did.

hmmm what else is new?
Ive been hanging out with Brittany nigger a lot lately
I love that girl
Ive surrounded myself with people I can act myself around
feel comfortable and have the most fun
like brittany, my cousin DJ, erika, david, leah, kadee, carrie2, joe, nick f, b love, ashley d, laura, heather, danielle, etc. if I missed you sorry.
but I love all my new friends

this weekend was pretty fun
Friday night Kadee came over and we had a lazy night. we rented movies and stayed up watching them and whatever. then saturday we went to the new century buffet.. mmmmm hmmm. Then Aaron came and got us and we took Kadeekins home. I spent the day and night at Aarons just laying around being lazy again.
I was suppose to go hangout with Carrie2 after she got out of snowball
but that never workedo ut cause her moms a cunt.
and today another lazy day with aaron at my dads.
my mom took me shopping Friday and I got a shit load of new stuff
BAWLLIN!

Ive been sick with eye infections, blah, and sore throats... pretty much gay.
so tomorrow I have to go back to school and get a ton of homework probably
Im pretty excited about that..not.
I got a new cell phone if Im needed
call it 8200683
love you:)

Lets set our hearts at self destruct....</3

Thu, 21 Jul 2005 19:23:26 GMT

If You Want to be added comment Or Im me at Poetictragedy133 .....

Sat, 08 Jan 2005 08:04:13 GMT

test

*Die Young & Save Yourself*